Who got voted off American Idol 2011 Season 10

Did you guys miss me? I’m pretty sure you did. I know I missed me… wait, what? Aha. Look at me, talking like I actually have fans. We all know that’s not true. Oh well. A girl can dream.

Anywho, we all know it was Group Week. I was pretty excited for this, because I’m SO SICK of the auditions, and last week, let’s just face it, sucked. Not eventful at all. But, Group Week has never let me down. The more drama, the better, yo’.

Here is my recap of the night.

There were 165 contestants left in the competition. Which means a lot of people have to be kicked out. Whew. Drama, Drama, Drama!!!! The contestants got to pick from a list of 20 songs… Bruno Mars “Grenade” and “Just the Way You Are,” as well as Cee-Lo Green’s “Forget You,” were among the songs performed most frequently in the group round, of course all done completely different. I can’t stand those songs SO much, that I was completely okay if the contestants ruined them.

Of course to start off the drama was the fact that all these boys and girls had to find a group to be in first of all. These guys thought they knew the game, so they started to form groups with the Day 1 performers thinking they were getting a head start on the competition. But there was a bit of a twist. Groups had to have a mix of Day 1 and Day 2 contestants. Oh, I guess that sucked for all of them, now didn’t it?

Then they showed Tiffany Starboobs. You guys remember her right? Well, guess what? All that cockiness she showed off during last week’s episode didn’t seem to do her any justice. “I’m sick of seeing all of these people TRY to do what I CAN do!”. Not to mention she can’t freakin’ sing. She tried to pair up with Scotty McCreery who apparently also couldn’t find a group, and was going around interviewing people. After Tiffany’s weird serenating session for Scott (mind you he’s 16 and she was on her knees), he just walked off. Wasn’t impressed at all. And later said she was “crazy”. But, that’s okay, because Tiffany stole this blonde Jessica chick, so then she had SOMEONE.

Scotty went to Jordan Dorsey’s group. ‘Dorsey had Scotty audition for them… but wanted no part of his deep country voice. And instead, this weezle Shane, or something, came into the group, sounding like Chris Brown, and Jordan was happy with that. I kind of know what Jordan was going for, he wanted them all to sound the same, without Scotty’s voice clashing with them.

No one wanted Scotty, Jessica, or Tiffany. Maybe they should just pair up? Nooo. That would be too easy, and the three of them would be a disaster waiting to happen. But, it all got figured out as Scotty got with the Guaps (sounds like a group full of guettos and guetettes), and Jessica+Tiffany got told they could sing in a pair… instead of a group. WHEW!

My crazy, lunatic Ashley Sullivan gets into a group. I wasn’t even sure if she was still in the competition. She was the one that… to say she had a mental breakdown in her audition… is an understatement.

Of course, since there are a crapton of people and all of them singing at the top of their lungs… SOME people (including James Durbin) were getting a wee bit annoyed. Some of the people were even going into the Bathroom to rehearse, because it had a good sound in there. EW!

Ahh yeah, and then there was this group of five kids… literally, kids. They called themselves The Minors. Which I thought was about the Miners in Chile. BAHA. I’m smart. They thought they would all OWN ITTTTT because they were stress free. Not to mention they all had their Moms to help them. How sweet is that?

Next up. They showed the group The Deep V’s with the dude that’s got extremely annoyed with the previous groups Moms, James Durbin. I recognized him, and one other person in the group with that bad dye job, Emma Henry… J-Lo said she would get eaten up in the competition. Hmm!

Rob Bolin, Chelsea Oaks and Jacqueline DuPree all paired up and called themselves Three’s Company. Rob couldn’t stand being around his ex, Jacqueline was upset about her boyfriend not being there… Chelsea was sad that she wasn’t on speaking terms with Rob… Oh my god. THEN, Rob was mad because he wasn’t in charge. BAHA. If he was in charge, they would have all failed. But, it’s okay if he’s a douche, Jacqueline said she would tazer him. Ohh, moving on.

Ashley Sullivan. She was crying, like she always does. She wanted to leave the competition. But, after she talked to her boyfriend, and got left alone for a bit, she was BACK. But, her group had been practicing without her. Guess that sucked. BUT, I still love her. Even though she’s annoying.

Lets run down this crap REALLY quick, because this is already going to be too long as it is… 3……2……1……

Jacee Badeauxwas in the group Guaps (with Scotty). But, they decided they didn’t want him anymore.
He was lost. But, eventfully hooked up with Brett Loewenstern and his group because they needed a Day 2 person. So he was saved. YAY.

After all 39 groups went to sleep… they were all awake bright and early. Everyone was sleepy, and what was up with J-Lo’s pants? They looked like something that belonged on an Oompa Loompa.

FINALLY. The performances.

“I’m addicted to adrenaline and a whole lot of other things, including wanting to hear you perform today,” said Steven.

First group.
Pia Toscano, Alessandra Guercio and Brielle Von Hugel sang. Not sure what they sang, or what their group was called… but they all made it through.

The next two groups are Jordan Dorsey’s former group, 440, and Jordan Dorsey’s current group, Four Plus One. Of course it had to be one right after another, at least that’s how they showed it.

Four Plus One starts things off with Jordan singing first. He sucks, but Robbie Rossen KIND OF saved his arse. And I like Robbie… a lot. The rest of them sucked as far as I’m concerned, but they all made it through.

Next up was 440. Adrian Somebody starts off the song… totally failing miserably. But, this Lauren Turner chick tried to save the day with her okay vocals… and the whole group made it through. So, I guess Jordan had nothing to worry about with either group.

Oh, my, god. Guess what happened next? TIFFANY AND JESSICA WERE IN THE BUILDING. What the hell was that Jessica thinking pairing up with her? They were both in matching, unsexy Leopard Print. And those shorts were entirely too short. But, anyway. They both sucked. We knew this would happen. Neither one of them made it, and of course, Tiffany had to blabble on, and annoy the judges about it. Kudos to Jessica for being okay with it.

Spanglish was after ^ that. After hearing all of their last names in this group, I know why they called themselves Spanglish. Jovany Baretto sang, and sucked. Jorge Gabriel sucked even more. Karen Rodriguez saved it all. Kind of. While deciding who was making it through, Steven thought 3 of the 4 were making it through, but once he got corrected, only Karen and Jovany made it through.

Then, we had to watch some girl stick spaghetti up her nose and pulling it out of her mouth. Um… great! She was with this next group who wanted to sing to Steven Tyler. Inviting him up on stage. It wasn’t too far from a strip show, but hey, it was memorable. Steven gave creepy-eyes to Lauren, who was the best of the bunch which is why she was the only one to make it. Noodlenose didn’t make it. Aw!

They showed a crapload that I won’t name off, that failed miserably, and forgot the words, or whatever. Ah! Damn!

Some people that might actually have a chance… The Hits is what they called themselves. My guuuurl Ashley was in this group. They were, BY FAR, the best harmonized, and all made it through. How exciting. Of course, Ashley was glad she stayed. Man, is it just me, or does she look like a crackhead? I bet we’ll find out she’s done some drugs before.

The Minors preformed. You know… all the kids. When they sang, they got a standing ovation, because they were the best of the night. Obviously. Good for them, I was hoping they would do well.

Next up is the group that couldn’t STAND The Minors. The Deep V’s… which just makes me think of something completely perverted. The group consisted of Emma Henry, James Durbin, Danny Pate and Caleb Johnson. They really could have used the Mothers from The Minors to help them. Because they weren’t that great. And although I kinda like James, he still wasn’t that good. But, him and Caleb made it through. Goodbye Emma, I guess J-Lo was right. OM NOM NOM!

Shall we bust through this again? 3……2……1…….

We then had this guy who was undeniably cheating by reading the lyrics off of his hands. Oh how sad. I don’t think he made it through.

Bleh, bleh, bleh. Irrelevant. But, I do know the chick with the hair armpits made it through at some point.

Finally someone who I had hopes for. The group was called Four Non-Blondes and That Guy. I liked their name. Caleb Hawley, Devyn Rush, Chris Medina, Carson Higgins and someone else formed this group. They were the only group that cussed, saying, “F*** You.” WHEW! Everyone made it through except Devyn.

Steven offended some people… YAY!

Sugarmama And The Babies was up next. This was, Denise Jackson, Brett Loewenstern, Jacee B and Stevie Cain. They all did well, and all made it through. There was some talk about Guaps throwing Jacee out, but he showed them by kicking their arse.

The crowd BOO’d the group that Jacee got kicked out of. So, Scotty said, “I love all of y’all, but Jacee’s the best kid in this competition,”. Aww. But, needed to say, Scotty isn’t the best, and his group was just, okay. However, the whole group made it through. Gross!

Ending the night was, Three’s Company. They had some issues, and they basically sucked. Rob didn’t make it, but the Jacqueline and Chelsea did. I think they should have all been thrown out of the building.

WOW. Too much writing. Yup! It wasn’t funny. I know. I was just doing a real recap for once. And never will I do it again. Sorry! Seemed like fun. What are your thoughts? LEAVE A COMMENT BELOW.

Cait Hagar.

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